1. |
Travel Kit
02:40
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gotta pack my bags, i’m going on a trip
i better get together my travel kit
full of boarding passes, maps, sunglasses
and an accent
for something new and different
got my boots footloose and shoes tied tight
i swear i’m prepared for any bus ride and flight
overnight layovers with meals not paid for
ain’t quite right, but i’ve got a new appetite
for places to go
sights to see
so many faces to know
and people who i’m gonna meet
so, soon i’ll be who i want to be
nobody to stop me when i’m in a new country
i want something more
maybe across the sea
because i’m getting bored
of my old home in this city
so, soon i’ll be who i want to be
nobody to stop me when i’m in a new country
and be the fool that i’m gonna be
nobody to stop me when i’m in a new country
searched my bags for necessities
old keys for doors i no longer go through and leave
mean nothing to me, i’ll declare solemnly
cold and alone, surrounded by these
graffitied walls down an empty hall
that reeks of nicotine and alcohol
i never thought this is where i’d call
a place to get away from it all
for places to go
sights to see
so many faces to know
and people who i’m gonna meet
so, soon i’ll be who i want to be
nobody to stop me when i’m in a new country
i want something more
maybe across the sea
because i’m getting bored
of my old home in this city
so, soon i’ll be who i want to be
nobody to stop me when i’m in a new country
and be the fool that i’m gonna be
nobody to stop me when i’m in a new country
shed my old identity
nobody to stop me when i’m in a new country
and be the fool that i’m gonna be
nobody to stop me when i’m in a new country
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2. |
Better in the Past
02:33
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each day over, i’m growing older
and each year brings my fears a bit closer
and as i flip my calendar over and over
the weeks don’t seem to go any slower
there’s nothing left to see, in this town
and no one left to meet, it just sounds
like everything just seems to get me down
at the ripe old age of 23,
is this how it’s meant to be?
at the tender age of 24,
i really hope there’s something more
and at 25, i’ll surmise
things must be better this time
26 just makes me sick
one drink’s all it takes for this
looking back at years gone fast
things always seem much better in the past
sick of saturday afternoons
sitting in my cold bedroom
scrolling through old photos of whom
i’ve not seen in a year or two
maybe i should get a clue
and realize they won’t do the same, we grew
apart, they’re on to something new
maybe i should do the same too
at the deadly age of 27,
should i even be thinking of heaven?
and when i am 28
you’d think by then i’d know my fate
by the time that i’m 29
there is nothing left to find
30, 31, 32, 33
by then it’ll all be the same to me
looking back at years gone fast
things always seem much better in the past
sometimes i think “if there’s a god above”
that they want me to just give up
accept a job in which i’ll grow dumb
and wait for all my limbs to go numb
i’ll pray
that it doesn’t have to be this way
but looking back at years gone fast
things always seem much better in the past
at 34 will i close the door
and hope i’ve found all i’m looking for
35, better open my eyes
stop pining for much better times
after this, the clock will tick
and won’t stop counting all those minutes
and i will miss all that i ever had
even when those things used to make me sad
looking back at years gone fast
things always seem much better in the past
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3. |
Help Me, Anxiety!
02:22
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help me, anxiety’s
been screwing with what i see
what i see
doesn’t seem
to be
what i wanted my reality to be
and it’s making me lose all my sleep
i’m sweating beneath my sheets
wanna dream of a way
to get through another day
at night, but it’s keeping me awake
i can’t feel my face
and i’ve got nothing to say
because my vocal chords
are acting like they just broke
like it came up
and struck me in the throat
fight me anxiety
i’ll take it in therapy
i’ll spin it’s head right round
like it makes me do now
but this time
it’s the one
hitting the ground
i’m not it’s goddamn lackey
it’s not gonna
take my chance to be happy
staying tucked away
to a corner of my brain
depending on how much xanax i can take
we’re not having another episode
of a show that we both know too well
where it’s holding back my breath
at a social event
because, the way it wants me to withstand
demands more than i can bear
and i’m just saying “it’s just not fair”
i don’t care, no matter how much it begs and pleads
i’m not helping anxiety
but it’s not the one who gets to declare
whether or not its thinks it’s fair
i don’t care
no matter how much it begs and pleads
i’m not letting it control me
no matter how much it begs and pleads
not ever helping anxiety
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4. |
Old Age Home
03:52
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haven’t seen the lady down the hall all week
the orderly says her room is being cleaned
but when you passed it last, it was empty
you’re not young and naive, you know what that means
some would say that you’re such a lucky guy
given more time than most just before you die
but you would say that that’s just another lie
there’s nothing worse than being left without them saying bye
and if memory serves correct
you’ve heard the ring, less and less
of telephone calls collect
from people who don’t just forget
“swear it’s not happening”
on your grave you’re soon to meet
at least you’ve got your family,
someone visiting”
and when they knock on the door
it feels a bit like before
the years when they weren’t born
when life could still give something more
it takes some getting used to
not getting used to
knowing we all go and die alone
waiting on another day soon to be done
envious of the man in the corner with no thumbs
taken care of, brought out by his only son
he won’t have to think of the day his young doesn’t come
some would say that you’re a blessed one
but at your old age, it seems like all is done
losing track of the days no longer seems so fun
it’s hard to know it’s not all just begun
it never gets easy to see
people just get up and leave
like they’ve gone out to sea
either sinking or drowning
never to return
fallen off the stern
and for them you’ll yearn
but you never ever learn
it takes some getting used to
not getting used to
losing sight and sound, losing sight and sound
but it takes more getting used to
not getting used to
having someone around
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5. |
I Am the Liquor
03:04
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waking up the clock’s, at half past two
hold my head and wonder “what did i get up to?”
check my phone’s texts and hope
i didn’t thumb somethin’ dumb, while sipping a red solo cup
put the coffee on, mumble some truths
like “i need to get a grip and take control”
as the filter drips, smell fills the room
i glance at the floor, where my head spent the night before
i brought out my emotions
with one or two cans of molson
chased it down with another round
please pretend that i sound so profound
but the only thing you’d notice
in the tone of my voice is
hopelessness
when i’m in three or four in
by thursday i’m counting down the days
don’t know how many more of em i can take
every minute till the weekend, i wait and wait
till i can fill my cup up another ounce or eight
on friday i’d go out to a bar
a place i claim where all of my friends are
but i’ll drive them away with the sullen words i’d say
and beg them to stay, i’d need a ride home anyways
all my thoughts and worries
spill out from this bottle of whiskey
pound ‘em back until i yak
then plead not to be thrown out on my ass
and if i must be honest
i’m in love with the catharsis
that comes along with the intoxicants
when i’m a few more drinks in
dream of the things i’m looking forward to
but they always end with me drunk from the brews
and early the next day, i will cry in shame
this lightweight
can’t walk straight
all red in the face
he’s such a waste
on sunday i’d hope to start anew
but i missed the bell call for the church pews
i slept through the day, letting it get away
but now it’s late and i’m wide awake
my headache is returning
and my throat is burning
the water from the tap’s not taking back
what i said and how i’d act
the worst of all of this
is that i know i won’t know my limit
when i’m three or four in
when i’m a few more drinks in
when the liquor’s pourin’
till the next morning
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6. |
Attics
04:35
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if i knew you soon would leave the room
i’d stop to think before you’d move
about what i would say to you
and if you’d listen to
all the things that i can’t say
‘cause when it seems
you’re here to stay
you’d get up and walk away
maybe i’ll get it out one of these days
concerns of mine’ll just rush to mind
but the nouns and verbs are so hard to find
if i could, i’d say why
but i’m a little tongue tied
i’m scared of what’s beneath
those eyes and what you keep
inside, the attic’s deep
in your mind, out of reach
we’ve all got thoughts that we don’t want to talk about
that put us beside ourselves
someone that we can hide behind
to keep you from finding out
all the things i can’t say, i’ll sing
and put it out to figure out these things
let it out and hope to god it brings
me closer, to what’s missing
all the things i can’t say i’ll sing
but you and i both know it stings
to hear something so startling
you thought i could never say, but it’d make you think
i’m a bottle with a message inside
washing up your shoreline
that’s without a single line
cause i don’t know what i’d write, but
if i had some sentences
i’d hope they’d make some sense
and hope they’d say things best
and not just make a mess
we’ve all got thoughts that we don’t want to talk about
that put us beside ourselves
sometimes i need to try, to pry
and trust the right words’ll fly out my mouth
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7. |
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i miss the sound the sidewalk made
as my footsteps found the shade
on the pavement,
made of grey
i’d walk down in that alleyway.
i miss the way the breeze blew on my face
as i walked down Adelaide
to meet friends and faces, for granted i’d take them
because i thought they’d always stay
like bill murray in groundhog day
in a place that’s not supposed to change
past the place i used to roam
so many years ago
see the way the garden’s grown
alongside of that corner store
down memory lanes and old faithfuls
i claimed i’d never again go
are a million names i’ll never know
because this ain’t my home no more
i miss the way the walls were stained
yellowed by sun and rays
of the bedroom where my head would lay
away from the yell of this city’s subways and trains
i miss how late i’d stay out for
getting headaches in the morn
i miss the taste of hangovers brought over
by the older kids next door
then staying in bed to rest my head
replaying each phrase that i said to them
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8. |
Been Waiting
03:14
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i’m sorry, but by now i must confess
you’re probably wondering why i’m getting so upset
if these words take longer to get out of my head
we’ll spur another memory i’d rather soon forget
is it me or does it seem like soon you’ll be
just somebody walking down the street
awkwardly avoiding the moment we’d meet
not wanting to stop for a talk or to even be seen
there’s something i don’t know how to say
my tongue just gets in the way
we’ve just been leading up to heartbreak
should we end it now or let it happen too late?
never thought i’d want to let you get away
but maybe this is just our fate
i’ve been waiting for all of this to go to shit
call me a prick, or a pessimist
waiting for all of this to go to shit
i’ve been watching the days and counting down the minutes
come on, please, you must admit
we’ve been a better fit, so much better than this
these days i’d say at best we’re fine
but fine doesn’t cut it enough this time
am i the only one who knows how this will go
one day in love, but not so tomorrow
so strange how the change is just part of the flow
and i can never anticipate what follows
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9. |
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we’re at our expiration date
it’s time for a change where nothing’s the same
you say "it’s the only solution and way
'cause we've been drifting over places and apart each day"
as if that makes it ok
and takes away all the pain
i’ll try to plead the case, to justify
to end it all with grace
but i’m just left asking why
i’ll come up with some stupid lines
but they just come out as self pity and lies
and i’ll think, that there’s still time
it’s not easy to believe
you're really saying what you mean
it’s not easy for me to see
how i couldn’t give you what you need
it seems we wanted different things
one bounded by dreams, the other by rings
but all i can see
and all i can think
is i can’t compete
with what would wash down our kitchen sink
and it makes me sink
into this bottle of my greatest fear
that reeks of cheap thrills and cheaper beer
i’ll spill it soon
at the sound of your voice
that’s bottled up
yet has too much joy
and though i hate to say your words still have a point
but it’s not easy to believe
you're really saying what you mean
can you tell me right just when
you knew that this would end
i’d say “we got time,
we got so much god damn time”
but you don’t want to keep up the lie
and pretend like things are fine.
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10. |
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everything must come to an end
did you ever think you’d say that to a friend
everything must come to an end
did you ever think you’d say that to a friend
the words you wished were never said
pierce the skin i thought we shed
the words you thought were never meant
hurt the most when replayed back in your head
if i could change the way i see you
that’s what i’d do
back to the day i got to meet you
in the corner of that room
but past the years that we’ve both been through
my view’s tainted with tears, drops of dew
everything must come to an end
did you ever think you’d say that to a friend
everything must come to an end
did you ever think you’d say that to a friend
everything feels cheap and spent
when you don’t know just how far you went
with the words you thought were never meant
that hurt the most when replayed back once again
i’ll act like i was duped
but so will you
and i know that you’re not the type of person to argue
and now my fears of living without you
they seem so clear, like they’re coming true
i’ll replay my mistakes over again
while taking for granted all those lessons
and all the ways i made you hurt
will make you pine for times that never were
i’ll replay my mistakes over again
kept awake by a phrase that drove you away
forget about the who’s to blame
hold doubt that things will ever be the same
i’ll bite and chew, what i’ve been through
and claim i’m somebody new
and that i’ve changed, and i’ll swear it’s true
but you know that i’ve not got a clue
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blvipond Toronto, Ontario
Brent Vipond is a Toronto, ON based singer-songwriter. Through a stripped down and visceral acoustic sound, Brent focuses on topics such as dealing with loss, anxiety, and the fear of getting older. His full-length album "Peaked" is available on all streaming platforms as of February 2021. ... more
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